Stress And Fear

Enemies to be fought

As I wrote earlier these days I am trying to process my emotions on my own, which I am really bad at. But I am confident that I will get better day by day and probably soon will be emotionally self-reliant.

Yesterday, I spent whole day fearing about the work to be put-together for the Micromasters course, at the library felt super stressed. Then again at home, did a lot binging which I always do, then later slept at night thinking about what might happen if I stay awake and work whole night.

Putting in a good days work, that’s what I promised myself, no one will come to rescue me in despair, no one will give me any money to protect me or my family anyway, its just this stupid emotions for unworthy people I have been carrying for long time.

Yesterday, I reached out to her and kind of panicked, shared everything what is happening with me, But she was nice. In fact that’s why I like her so much, every time when I fall down, she held’s me up.

Also I had reached out two friends to deal with the stress, instead I could have put together, anyways I need to get better at dealing with fear and stress on my own. And Stop thinking about her and anybody.

As I always say to my friends … for a Men, women is a great source of distraction, all around, their special parts or any moment wasted observing them or fantasising about them.

On Good things, I have got two more interview calls, I don’t know this will end up in a job opportunity or not, I am also not hopeful either. What I am hopeful is to be able to put together my true self, best self in all cases. In fact that is what counts always.

Good Day..

9th September, 2019