How do I feel the feelings?

Without Numbing it with any other agents?

This is something I am trying to make sense of these days. Often times emotions are far away from truth or reality. But hence there are also emotions, which we count on.

I do not know how they emerge, but I am trying to understand it nowadays from e deeper perspectives, what triggers me, whom/what are the things I create emotions for? And how do I bypass triggers or cues?

Till now, I process emotions with people, technology, food and often times a compulsive obsessive behaviour, such as compulsively touching myself, long-distance walk or organizing or as such.

But I am happy, that I am developing awareness. I guess I am becoming hyperaware. The more I am digging, I am gathering more about myself. I am not curious about others that much anymore.

Everything seems a reflection of what happens within. That’s why I don't care anymore about what happens outside.

Life seems to get better, as I am understanding all my emotions, what were the triggers behind of creating those.

By the way I feel bloated now, as my food addiction gone out of control. It will be a challenging week for me and incredibly tough too.