Focusing on Too Many Things Again

Being Over-whelmed again and ending up doing nothing| An Ordinary Human Beings Journal

I read somewhere obstacle is the way, that means where there is an obstacle there could be a way we could find forward using that. I still don’t understand what does that means, But so far it seems that is it.

Minimizing triggers, external obstacles and finding the inner balance within regardless of external reality. I know the theories, I read them again and again.

But its constantly hard and challenging, being hyper-aware about my emotional triggers, especially, what is the external event or stimuli and what kind of emotion I am creating within, using that, such as people asking awkward questions in the street or my brothers tantrums, which has risen a lot these days or money-hungry relatives.

I am still not grounded but I am trying one day at a time, with small steps. Today I found a quiet spot in our home, my sister’s newly built shed inside our home.

The most positive thing I have done today, I meditated for an hour after a long time. I need to find the quiet miracles within, digging deep within again.

My dysfunctional pattern of finding solace in food, people or all other external objects is rising, here I take a vow to find the solution within.

Everything that I ever need or I will ever need is within. Today I find peace within, sitting with myself, closing my eyes, every single day, single hour or sometimes one minute at a time.

Shihab

3rd July, 2021